To my utmost chagrin, it's quite clear that I am not. Something was missing when Harry and I faced each other on the Hogwarts grounds. Something was missing when he explained the real history of the Elder wand. Harry stood there, full of energy and life and... completion. Somehow, I heard his words but did not consider. In effect, I killed myself with a wand that could not obey me in the hands of my enemy.
And yet I did not die. Or maybe I did. This emptiness where I lurk but know only raises more questions. At times, it is nothing but slate gray around me, and I have to wait through it. There is nothing to do when one has no form, and the scenary around you has vanished. But this emptiness is more often Hogwarts. I can see it being rebuilt. I see portraits painted, awards won, Quidditch played, fear lifted. All in my absence. Far be it from me to deny that I made an impact. After all, they're so happy with my defeat. I do not know if I am a ghost in his early stages or whether death is a far more complicated matter than I had anticipated and feared. All I know is that the emptiness knows my hell, to see but not touch, to know but not act. I hover in the library, in classes, but I know the lessons and the pages like fingerprints. And I can't turn the pages myself, cannot answer in classes that are dumb as a post.
I have not won. I couldn't win. I know that now.
Muse: Lord Voldemort
Fandom: Harry Potter
Word count: 271 words
And yet I did not die. Or maybe I did. This emptiness where I lurk but know only raises more questions. At times, it is nothing but slate gray around me, and I have to wait through it. There is nothing to do when one has no form, and the scenary around you has vanished. But this emptiness is more often Hogwarts. I can see it being rebuilt. I see portraits painted, awards won, Quidditch played, fear lifted. All in my absence. Far be it from me to deny that I made an impact. After all, they're so happy with my defeat. I do not know if I am a ghost in his early stages or whether death is a far more complicated matter than I had anticipated and feared. All I know is that the emptiness knows my hell, to see but not touch, to know but not act. I hover in the library, in classes, but I know the lessons and the pages like fingerprints. And I can't turn the pages myself, cannot answer in classes that are dumb as a post.
I have not won. I couldn't win. I know that now.
Muse: Lord Voldemort
Fandom: Harry Potter
Word count: 271 words
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